Girls Just Wanna...Settle Down? (WTF!)

Who knew that (quasi-)profound thinking could arise out of a viewing of Romy & Michele’s High School Reunion? (I did, actually. This may explain why I am not well-liked among my English professors…)

Romy and Michele should be required viewing for anyone who is witnessing their former high school classmates marry off and procreate and wonders why the hell they’re throwing away their lives so quickly. For reaffirmation of the fact that these people are nuts, watch this film.

For any (totally uninformed) people out there who are not familiar with the plot, the film follows two fun-loving, fashionable 28-year-olds who escaped Arizona after high school to live in Los Angeles. Despite the fact that Romy is a cashier at a car dealership and Michele is unemployed, they are perfectly happy living the carefree single life. That is until they run into (the spectacular) Heather Mooney, a former classmate and discover that their high school reunion is two weeks away. Feeling insecure about their lack of impressive jobs or significant others, Michele tries to find a job while Romy searches for potential boyfriends. They both fail in these endeavors and eventually turn on each other. When they get to the reunion and find that the ladies of their school’s A-group are all married, pregnant and miserable, they realize that their lives were not so bad after all.

What does all of this have to do with anything that is culturally relevant at the moment? My Facebook feed, mostly inhibited by the class of 2008, is currently vomiting up wedding plan discussions, engagement announcements and creepy photos of couples in trees, documenting a disturbing trend of college-aged, barely-old-enough-to-drink adults getting hitched before they even have legitimate jobs. And it gets worse. Sometimes they even reproduce. CHILDREN. Maybe it’s because I’m sitting here watching Spongebob Squarepants and drinking apple juice, but I cannot fathom how anyone would want to be responsible for raising (“like we’re chickens or something” /lizziemcguirequote) children at this point in our lives.

If one can learn anything from ‘90s Lisa Kudrow flicks, it’s the importance of realizing that impressing people is useless because all that matters is that you’re having fun and enjoying life, so there is nothing wrong with living in LA with your best friend in your twenties and working on finding your niche rather than settling down with a not-very-interesting guy and never leaving a town full of big trucks and small minds.

This future?

Or this?

You know how I roll.

Of course, to each his (or her) own. As Romy asserts, you don't have to give a flying fuck what I think, because as demonstrated in the following clip, Romy and Michele certainly don't.